Standing here without a stitch
Forbidden to make one twitch
Been here since don't know when
Yet never could I get a tan
Some say I might be David
Yes I could be him indeed
But why was I made by Michelangelo
I guess I will never know
Was it to depict my manhood
For admiration by the neighbourhood?
Or how tiny it should not be
So the average man would be happy?
In 1991 a mad man hammered me
Hit my toes but spared my "wee wee"
It still hurts don't you know?
Now there's a bird on top and one below
Is there more of this humiliation?
How much longer of such frustration?
It's not easy being a sculpture
Rain, shine and stares to endure
So you think there's nothing to that?
Just not moving can make you fat
It happened in the museum
I became obese ad nauseum